As Startup Life: Surviving and Thriving in a Relationship with an Entrepreneur gets closer to it’s publication date (it’s January, but you can pre-order now – hint hint) I’ve been getting increasing number of notes from folks I know about their own experiences. Today’s is from Sandy Grason about her thoughts around her relationship with husband Rich Kwiat. I think all of this stuff is powerful and magical – Sandy, thanks for taking the time to put your thoughts out there in the world.
So, I’ve been reading some of your thoughts on relationships and thinking about your book…. These thoughts woke me up at 3am, whenever something wakes me up at 3am I know I’m supposed to pay attention to it, because I love to sleep, like a lot. Here’s what I believe…
I met Rich Kwiat when we were both 19 years old. I didn’t realize I was falling in love with a serial entrepreneur, I thought I was falling in love with a rock star. I now know the two career paths have quite a bit common. We’ve been together for over 26 years and he’s still my favorite person to hang out with. People constantly ask me what the secret is to our relationship and I never really know what to say. I tell my daughters, find a man that makes you laugh, because if you can laugh even when you’re in a fight, you’ll be okay. No one makes me laugh harder than Rich.
But I think the best information about being in a relationship with an entrepreneur (or a rock star) actually came from a song that Rich wrote many, many years ago. He’s not one to preach “live in the moment” whoo-whoo philosophy and before we had kids he was strictly rock-n-roll, but this song sums up everything you need to know to be happy in a relationship (or in life for that matter). The song is called “This Ordinary Life” and here a few of the lyrics:
Once in a while, through this ordinary life we’ve made on broken dreams, we’ll catch our eyes & still know what’s there between.
Yesterday seems oh so far, I thought I’d reach and touch the stars, I’d never knew I’d share the moon with you.
Once in a while through our daily measure, I’ll get to feel your warm embrace, if what we have is ordinary…. it’s for me.
I made a video for Rich a few years ago for this song. You can see what Rich looked like with hair :-)
Our little girls are now 16 & 14 and Rich is on his 4th or 5th start up, I’ve lost count. We haven’t had the big google sale yet, but we still stay up late talking about all of the incredible possibilities that being a serial entrepreneur brings to life. I’d much rather be in a relationship with a passionate entrepreneur than a punch-the-clock, 9-to-5-er. It’s the roller coaster versus the merry-go-round. (My favorite “Parenthood” reference, some people prefer the Merry-go-round, but it just goes round and around, same everyday… I prefer the roller coaster, it’s scary and exiting and makes you feel so alive.)